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70 lines
2.8 KiB
Plaintext
70 lines
2.8 KiB
Plaintext
PUBERTY
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PURPOSE.
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This language's code is supposed to resemble a pubertal masturbation procedure.
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It is not intended to find use in public business.
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The language was written to explore a new way of programming.
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FUNCTIONAL PRINCIPLE.
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The program begins by stating the date and the time, then the person is introduced,
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and the kinks are listed, arousement level strongest to weakest. After that short
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intro, the real code follows.
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There are 6 byte-sized registers(A,B,C,D,E,F), all starting with value 0, which are used to manipulate data,
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and a register pointer(called REGPTR), which is initialized with 0.
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After an instruction is executed, the following code is executed: `REGPTR%=6 ; REGISTERS[REGPTR]%=256`.
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INTRO.
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First comes the date sentence. American date notation is used; the time zone is GMT.
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Example:
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It is August 15, 2018, 04:32:06 PM.
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This initializes $D to 1534350732(the Unix timestamp of the date)%256.
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Second sentence uses the pattern `<CHARACTER> is in his bed, bored.`
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Example:
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Izu is in his bed, bored.
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This initializes $C to 3, the character count of the character's name.
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Third sentence uses the pattern `(His|Her|Their) secret (kink is|kinks are) <kink1>(, <kinks>).`
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Example:
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His secret kinks are fatfurs, inflation, growth and kitsunes.
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Now the word "fatfur" = 5, "inflation" = 4, "growth" = 3 and "kitsunes" = 2.
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This'll come in handy soon.
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Fourth sentence(optional) uses the pattern `(Suddenly|Then) ((he|she) spots|they spot) <kink>.`
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!The matching personal pronoun from sentence 3 MUST be used here!
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Example:
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Suddenly he spots fatfurs.
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This initializes $A to 2^<kink>; so in this case $A=2^5=32.
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If this sentence is left out, $A=0.
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Fifth sentence is "(Suddenly|Then|Soon) the following sounds become audible."
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!This sentence needs to conclude the introduction!
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After that, the program code follows.
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ALL KEYWORDS EXCEPT FOR `OMG MOM GET OUTTA HERE` ARE CASE-INSENSTIVIE
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KEYWORDS.
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fap - increments the register pointed to by REGPTR by 1
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ugh - zeroes the value of the current register
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<kink>,fuck - increments the register pointed to by REGPTR by the value of <kink> | IF USED ONCE, IT HAS A COOLDOWN OF 2^<KINK-2> FAPS
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<kink>,hnng - increments the register pointed to by REGPTR by 2^<kink> | IF USED ONCE, IT HAS A COOLDOWN OF 2^<KINK-1> FAPS
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yeah - increments REGPTR by 1
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yes - print the ASCII value of the current register
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oh - input an ASCII char into the current register
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OMGMOMGETOUTTAHERE - immediately halts the program | MUST BE ALL UPPERCASE
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sigh - immediately halts the program
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squirt - equivalent to `yes yeah yes yeah yes yeah yes yeah yes yeah yes yeah`
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ngh <comment> hhh - comment, will not be evaluated
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hrg <loop> mmf - loop until current register is zero
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